What If We Just Told The Truth?

Friends & Family:

Well another year has passed and it’s time to catch you up on all the news here. As you know Bob has not had a job in three months because he got laid off at the car dealership. Who knows what he will do now, as it’s not easy finding work selling stupid stuff that people don’t need these days.

Marge is doing fine since she unloaded all that bad debt in her bankruptcy filing. She’s feeling lighter than air, now that she’s not paying $30,000 annually to credit card finance charges. She doesn’t even care that Bob doesn’t have a job, because it means more quality time with family.

Marge and Bob had a great time in September holding a yard sale and selling off all the TVs, computers,cell phones, ipods and SUVs that were no longer affordable. Truth be told, the SUVs were acting as yard ornaments for more than a year because of gas prices anyway :).

Our son little Bobby was really in the money earlier in the year until the police busted him for drug dealing. Boy, we sure had a few good steak dinners until that happened! He’s got his daddy’s selling gene, that’s for sure. Hopefully, they’ll teach him how to use that skill in a legal job while he’s counting the days in prison.

As for our daughter, Suzy, she’s doing great on her most recent medication, so we’re just keeping our fingers crossed this one will work. We had a lovely visit with her in the hospital recently, and she didn’t even seem to mind that we were selling her doll collection in the yard sale. She just sat there and nodded.

We’d love to send you all lots of stupid, overpriced gifts to display our wealth and status...but we’re broke, so we thought this year we’d ask everyone to take the money they’d spend on stupid gifts for us, and just buy yourselves a little something.

We won’t be sending out Christmas cards this year because we can’t afford the stamps, so Marge is sending this letter as a Reply All.

Sorry if you received this letter by mistake,

Merry Christmas!